Has this week been full or what? Is it just the change in seasons… trying to go from cold to spring? Everyone around me has been sick with sinus infections (bacterial and viral) like the one I battled weeks ago.
The same issues are wrangling in my brain and I continue to ask myself why?
Why do I push myself so hard to accomplish certain things to live up to my self expectations? What am I trying to accomplish outside of killing myself?
I am trying hard to study for a piece of a national certification that fell between my fingertips last November. My exam is on May 1st and all my spare time is going to cramming. Why do I feel the need to accomplish this? I've got a great job where I am valued and appreciated and am secure in knowing that I am contributing to the greater good. Why the stress?
Why do I continue to stress about keeping our home a certain way? Seriously? My hubs is so laid back about the house, but it drives me nuts to have things all cluttered and unplanned. Planning meals, cleaning up, working on the yard… What pushes me?
I am completely clear on the whole weight issue. I know that my motivation to work out and eat right are based on the fact that I have not taken such good care of this temple that houses the Lord. I've been quite lackadaisical about it since getting sick.. but am working on getting back to the gym and writing down what I am eating. Makes me more aware. But why do I stress about it?
What is preventing me from just resting in His presence and having some plain ole fun?
And shall I just say that the whole season of being a mom on a daily basis is quickly changing. This time next year, Griffin will graduate from high school. This time next year, Lisa and Becca will become Seniors. So why do I keep stressing and what keeps me from enjoying our time together?
Just some things I have been thinking about and praying about.
By the way, these blogs have been such an encouragement to me the last few days:
So what do you think? What is on your mind?